


I could spend my life in this sweet surrender

by riversdamsel



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-22
Updated: 2015-07-01
Packaged: 2018-04-05 13:22:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 21,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4181403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/riversdamsel/pseuds/riversdamsel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He's supposed to be worried about dragging her arse to jail, not about how gorgeous she looks as she relaxes almost insolently in his beat up armchair like it's her own personal throne.</p>
<p>AU in which the Doctor is a bounty hunter and River is the fugitive.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. There's meltdown in the sky

**Author's Note:**

> Bounty hunter AU
> 
> Needed another break from the Spy AU I'm working on and this happened (what is with me and AUs???). I got the idea from a book I started reading but never finished because I decided that the Doctor and River in this situation would be much more entertaining (:
> 
> Work title from I Don't Want to Miss a Thing by Aerosmith. Chapter title from Livin' on the Edge...also by Aerosmith (:

Before today, the category of unemployment seemed to hold every unemployed person except for John Smith.  He'd been "let go" by his previous employer a good eight months ago, but that didn't mean he was  _unemployed_.  Unemployment was for the poor fellow who didn't have enough motivation to go more than two miles from his front door, who relied on government help, who didn't have enough natural talent to "make it," whatever that meant.  Unemployment wasn't for John Smith.  Except now, as he stares at the notice of eviction that's been hastily jammed into the crack of his flat door, John begins to think that maybe he fits the unemployment category better than he thought.

Luckily, his current landlord is a bit more lenient than most, giving John three months to either get his rent together or get the hell out.  Sighing, John sticks the eviction notice back to his door and turns to face the street, not yet ready to walk into his crumby flat that is more or less a reflection of the current crumby state of his crumby life.His feet carry him along the sidewalk, grumbling passersby giving him more company than he's had all week, and the unusually bright sun warming his skin.  The deep thinking that's occupying most of his mind is just about to turn into a full on sulk when a body collides directly into his, sending him crashing to the ground without any prior warning.There's the brief weight of another person on top of him, and in his shock he barely has time to register the golden curls, the green eyes, and the smirk that comes with a "Sorry sweetie, I'm sort of in a rush," before the woman is up and gone, sprinting down the sidewalk in the opposite direction.  Clutching his scraped elbow, John gapes after her, letting people walk around him and petulantly thinking that the universe is set on bullying him today.  Maybe staying in his crumby flat would've been the better option after all.Twenty minutes later finds him sat on his friends' sofa, pouting as Rory repeats for the third time, "You don't need a band-aid."John sniffs.  "Your nurse's license should be revoked- I'm bleeding out!"Amy inspects the wound on his elbow and snorts.  "It's just a scrape, Raggedy Man.""How did you manage it, anyway?"  Rory asks as John pouts silently and tries to twist his arm to inspect the damage himself."A woman," he answers simply, inwardly feeling a bit victorious as his two friends raise their eyebrows simultaneously, though the feeling doesn't stay for long as Amy wrinkles her nose and says, "Please tell me it's not some sort of weird sex injury.""Oi!  I am more coordinated than that, Pond!""Tell that to your elbow," Rory comments in his normal deadpan, unaffected when John turns a glare on him."It wasn't a sex thing," he mumbles, adamantly refusing to acknowledge the heat he feels spreading across his cheeks.  "I was just walking along and then the next thing I know I was on the ground- she just crashed right into me and kept going!  Rude, really.""Yes, terrible," Amy speaks, her tone sounding more amused than anything else.  "So what are you really doing here?"John frowns at the question and Amy sighs, giving him a knowing look.  "I know you didn't show up just to have Rory look at your elbow."At her words, John sighs and drops his elbow.  "You remember that job you were telling me about the other week?""Oh the one you had absolutely no interest in even hearing about because you  _'don't need a job'_?  That job?""The sass is unappreciated, Pond."Amy snorts.  "Well why are you asking about it now?"Inwardly groaning, John forces out his next words.  "I need it."XxXTwo hours later and he's standing in front of a small, rather worse for wear building proclaiming itself to be " _Lux's Bail Bonds_."  Well maybe standing is a bit of an understatement.  More like pacing and internally arguing with himself over whether or not he should go inside.After giving one final glare to the now crumpled paper in his hand that has the address written on it in Amy's neat handwriting, John shoves it into the pocket of his tweed jacket and enters through the double doors in one sweeping motion.The doors squeak closed behind him as he stands just inside the entrance, taking in his surroundings.  He's not exactly sure what he was expecting to find inside a bail bond agency- perhaps a queue of rich men in suits who think their dirty money puts them above the law.  Maybe a few hardened criminals putting up a fight.  At least an attorney or two.  Not  _nothing_ , which is currently what is occupying the small reception room.  The few chairs are empty, the television looks broken, and the only sound is that of a slowly oscillating ceiling fan and the occasional  _pop_  that comes from the receptionist and her gum."Can I help you, sir?"  Calls the girl who sits behind the desk.  This is his moment.  He could easily walk out the door and not give another thought to this job that would no doubt be a hell on Earth.  When he steps forward, the only thing motivating him is the lingering thought of the eviction notice he came home to earlier in the day."Er, yes, actually," he speaks to the receptionist.  She's a young girl, big eyes that seem to hold a bit of vagueness and long dark hair pulled into a ponytail at the side of her head that makes her seem like she just walked out of the 80s.  "I'm here to speak with Mr. Lux about a job."The girl-  _Evangelista_ , according to her name tag- glances over his form before giving a small, confused frown.  "A bounty job?""No, the filing job," John answers, hating the words even as they come out of his mouth.  He's a renowned physicist for Heaven's sake, he shouldn't have to be doing something as demoralizing as filing documents just to pay the rent."Oh!"  She exclaims, smiling brightly like she understands now.  "I'm sorry but that position was filled last week."The most pathetic part of this situation is that despite his own loathing toward the thought of this job, he feels even worse now that he knows he can't have it.  Maybe his feelings had nothing to do with the job at all, but rather his current financial standing.  John sighs- it was so much easier to despise something that was optional."Is there anything else I can help you with, Sir?""No, I-" John stops, his brain suddenly running a mile a minute.  "Actually, yes.  How...how much do bounty jobs pay?"  He leans a bit on the desk as Miss Evangelista gives him the briefest look of skepticism before quickly typing in a few things on her computer."Our recovery agents get ten percent of the bond from the fugitive they bring in," she states before glancing back at the screen of the computer.  "Right now we only have one fugitive who doesn't have an agent going after her, but that's because no one's been able to bring her in so far."  Miss Evangelista gives a small laugh at the end, and he wonders if it's that she doesn't take the matter seriously or if it's that she doesn't take  _him_  seriously.  In fairness, he's not even sure if he's taking himself seriously- he's never before considered  _bounty hunting_.  Look at him!  He's so thin the wind could knock him over- in fact, it has.  On three separate occasions.  Not that he would publicly admit it."How much is her bond?""A million pounds."John freezes, feeling his eye bulge a bit.  "You're telling me that if I bring her in, then I get a hundred thousand quid?"Miss Evangelista nods, giving another short laugh.  "But like I said, no one's been able to catch her."He swallows, thinking about his empty fridge, the car he's been unable to make payments on, and that dreaded eviction notice.  If he doesn't do something, he's going to be out on the street in three months.  "Let me speak to Mr. Lux."Eyeing him hesitantly, she nods and picks up the phone, calling Mr. Lux from his office in the back.  A minute later a short man with balding hair and an air of annoyance about him appears, frowning at John like he's a waste of time.  "The filing job's already been filled.""I'm not here for  _filing_ ," John answers, finally allowing his displeasure toward the job seep into his tone.  "I want to be one of your recovery agents."Mr. Lux barks out a laugh.  " _You_?"John sticks out his chin defiantly.  "Me.""Okay," says Mr. Lux, a scornful smile curling the edges of his lips, "Let's just say I ignore your lack of physical requirements.  The only person we need recovered is a woman who's seemed to have completely disappeared off the map.""I can find her," John states confidently.  "Just...just let me see her file."He's not quite sure what prompts Mr. Lux to comply, but after a silent minute of study, he reaches behind the desk and pulls a red file from the bottom of a stack and hands it over.The minute John opens the file, he smiles.  Maybe the universe was more in his favor than he thought.  "I'm afraid I was wrong, Mr. Lux.  I said I could find her.  What I should have said was that I already  _did_."Mr. Lux narrows his small eyes.  "What do you mean?"Still smiling down at the picture of the woman with riotous blonde curls and a smirk he could never forget, John answers, "I just ran into her today."  Literally.Eyes widening, Mr. Lux purses his lips into a thin white line.  "You're lying.""Afraid not.""Where?"John grins.  "Give me the job and I'll tell you all about it."Mr. Lux makes a frustrated noise and John takes that as a sound of defeat, knowing the man would not be able to give up any sort of lead on a woman who owes him so much money and has been missing for months.  Glancing back down at the picture of the woman, he smirks as he recalls the pet name she gave him in her brief apology on the street and whispers, "Hello,  _sweetie_."XxXThe file on his curly-haired fugitive is pretty much useless.  It proclaims her name to be River Song (that has to be an alias right?), lists her previously known places of residence (he doubts she would still be anywhere near any of them), and lists her posted bond and crime (a million pounds- murder).  John swallows tightly at the last bit.  Murder.  He, a man who pours over scientific research day in and day out, has decided to chase down a murderer.  They might as well go ahead and pull out a body bag for him."You can't be  _serious_  about this, John!"  Amy's normal Scottish shrill seems even higher than normal and John winces."I am completely serious about this, Pond!""Have you even thought it through?!""Of course I have!  I need money- this one job gets me a lot of it.  End of."" _No.  Not_  end of.  Have you ever shot a gun before?"John hesitates.  "No, but it can't be that difficult.""Do you even know where to start looking for her?"He frowns, not liking where these questions are going.  "Yes!  I mean...no.  Not exactly.  I have a few places in mind, though."Amy crosses her arms.  "Right.  Sure.  Let's say you find her.  Have you thought about what you're gonna do then, Raggedy Man?  I doubt she's just going to go willingly."John frowns and opens his mouth to respond, but is cut off by Rory looking up from River's file and joining the conversation for the first time.  "I know who she is."Amy and John stare at him, prompting a patient sigh.  "She was in the news a while back for shooting that Father Octavian fellow.  Right between the eyes."  He touches his forehead seemingly without thought, and John's frown only deepens.  "Who's Father Octavian?""You've heard of Kovarian, yeah?"John nods.  "She over some underground crime ring or something, right?""She controls the importing and exporting of illegal weapons.  Octavian was like her second in command."Amy frowns.  "Well then isn't it a good thing he's dead?"Rory shrugs.  "Murder's still murder."John shakes his head, feeling like he's missing a piece of the puzzle.  "Why would they give her bail?""Maybe the police have their lot thrown in with Kovarian.  And I imagine Kovarian wants River's head regardless if she's in jail or not, so why not get some money out of it?"  Rory frowns at himself.  "I think I've been watching too much telly.""John, if that's true, then both the mob and the police are going after this woman."  Amy gives him a look as she speaks that somehow conveys that of sympathetic disbelief.  "And they've been looking for her for  _months_.  Just...just find a different job."A small frown tugs at the edges of John's lips as he thinks, knowing that his friends' seeming lack of confidence in him is more likely to be concern for his safety.  He doesn't blame them- he can't even walk down the street without getting injured.  It would probably be easier to turn from this job and find something else, but the deal is one he just can't seem to pass up.  Besides, who ever said bounty hunting was all about physicality?  If he can just find her and outsmart her, he could have his rent paid within the week.  It can't be that difficult, right?John looks up at his two friends with a new determination.  "I'm going to find her."XxXJohn wearily enters his flat later that night, his mind running through the events of this past extremely long day and half-heartedly thinking about his mission ahead.  Had he been paying more attention he would have realized something was off, would have noticed the eviction notice missing from his door and felt the presence that comes with the nearness of another human being even when you can't see them.  But he doesn't notice, so when he flips on the light in his small sitting room he is nearly scared to death by the figure lounging in his arm chair.Stumbling backward, his back hits the wall and he clutches at his chest, as if his hand alone can keep his hammering heart from jumping out of his body.  "Bloody hell!"  He exclaims, not moving an inch and the watching the woman sitting across from him with wide eyes as he tries to even out his breathing- he's 90 percent positive that she can smell fear.The woman smirks, a brief twitch at the corner of her lips that speaks more than probably her words ever could.Okay.  He's 100 percent positive.River Song sits before him and for the first time he has the opportunity to really take in her appearance.  He finds himself thinking she is absolutely stunning, and wondering if that thought is somehow a personal betrayal to his mission- he's supposed to be worried about dragging her arse to jail,  _not_  about how gorgeous she looks as she relaxes almost insolently in his beat up armchair like it's her own personal throne."John Smith," she speaks in a sultry voice that she seems to be unaware of, offhandedly waving the piece of paper in her hand that he recognizes as his eviction notice.  "A rather unremarkable name, don't you think?"  Her eyes gleam with mischief, and he suddenly regrets not having been the one to speak first- he's unwittingly given her the upper hand.Standing a little straighter in hopes of coming off intimidating in some way, John replies, "It's  _Doctor_  John Smith, actually.""I see."  Another smirk.  "Pardon me,  _Doctor_."  She lays the eviction notice aside, and for a moment he thinks she's getting ready to stand, but instead she crosses her legs as she settles further in his chair, her thumb brushing unconsciously across her lower lip in thought as she silently studies him.The woman he's meant to be looking for is sitting right in front him like she doesn't have a care in the world- right in his own flat!  Why is she here?  She's a murderer- is she here to kill him?  John swallows heavily, and River smiles suddenly, a rather breathtaking sight as the skin around her eyes crinkles in amusement.  "I'm not here to kill you," she says, unsettling John because  _how_  did she know what he was thinking?"Why are you here, then?""To warn you.  Though I have to admit I'm a bit disappointed- I was expecting them to send a much larger person after me this time."John frowns.  "Don't underestimate me."She smiles again, the sight arresting his heart.  "Oh sweetie, I'm not.  But you don't know what you're getting into."  River waves at the eviction notice resting on his side table.  "If all you're looking to do is get some cash to pay the rent, I suggest you find another job."Irritation, fear and a little bit of awe fills him as he watches the woman before him, but he pushes those things aside.  "Why would I do that when you've already done my job for me?  I didn't even have to go out and find you.  Considerate of you, really.""Well if you're insistent on coming after me even after my warning, I'm afraid that you still have a lot of catching up to do."John raises his brow.  "You're sitting right here."She gives a nod, a small smile gracing her lips.  "Yes, but I'm about to stand up and walk right out of your door.  And you're going to let me."He scoffs.  "And why would I do that?""There are many reasons, like your lack of ability to detain me for instance."  River stands as she speaks, invading his space and coming close enough for him to see the flecks of gold in her green eyes, her perfume invading his senses in an intoxicating whiff that makes him think of jasmine vines, the moon, and danger.  "But even more than that, I think it is because you're rather looking forward to chasing me, Doctor."She leaves with a smile, his door closing silently behind her and the image of her smirk permanently seared into his brain.  Stifling a grin, he chooses to ignore the accuracy of her statement.XxXOver the next three days, John sells his rather expensive car, buys another one that's just short of a piece of junk, and is sold a hand held gun by a feisty little brunette with big eyes.  The cold metal feels wrong in his hand, but at least he'll feel a bit more prepared when he next runs across River Song.  Regardless of her criminal status, a thrill runs through him at the thought of seeing her again.  He thinks he finally understands the phrase ' _fatal attraction_.'Her file in the passenger seat, John rattles up to her last known residence in the car he's becoming less and less sure will actually stay alive.  Shutting off the engine and stepping out onto the pavement, John sheds his tweed and flounders with the gun in his hand before eventually and uncomfortably settling to tuck it into the back of his trousers.The block of flats he approaches is by no means extremely classy...or at all classy, really.  Actually, they're rather a dump.  His nose wrinkles as he enters the communal hallway and ascends the stairs to the second floor, trying not to think about how it smells of cat urine and moldy wood.  Besides the distant mumbling and canned laughter from a television held in an apartment down the hall, the building is pretty quiet.  Almost too much so for his liking.John scans the hallway as he makes his way down, his steps muffled by an ill looking green carpet.  For the umpteenth time he reminds himself that he doesn't need to feel as if he's sneaking around- he's a recovery agent.  This is his job.When he reaches flat number 211 at the end of the hall he stops, taking in the tarnished gold numbers and the peeling grey paint that covers the door.  Okay.  This one is hers. Now how to get in?  For a whole minute he just stands there, staring hopelessly at the door and feeling oddly like this is some physical metaphor for this entire job.Groaning, John goes to bang his head on the door in frustration, but is shocked when instead of met with resistance, the door opens and sends him stumbling forward and inside.  Heart pounding, he looks around with wide eyes, finally settling his gaze on the lock of the door to find it broken off, as if someone has already broken in.In that moment, his eyes feel as wide as they can possibly go and his ears feel like they're straining to hear some indication of an intruder other than himself.  Logically he knows that the lock could have been broken off anytime over the past couple of months, meaning he's here only with his own thoughts and fears, but just stumbling about seems like the wrong thing to do regardless.After a few moments of silence that put him at ease, John steps further into the flat, the soles of his boots tapping lightly against the cheap linoleum of the kitchen floor.  His eyes sweep over the small space, and he takes the time to check the cupboards, finding them all empty.  As he moves through the sitting room and into the small bedroom, it becomes all too apparent that she no longer lives here- not a single trace of a person can be found, and he wonders why the rent for this space continues to be paid.  A small layer of dust blankets everything in the space and his heart sinks.  He's not exactly sure what he was hoping to find, but he was rather hoping it was going to be more worth his time.Trying not to feel defeated, he leaves the flat telling himself that just because he didn't find anything doesn't mean it was a waste of time.  Hopping in his car, he tosses his gun in his passenger's seat and starts the engine, not exactly sure where he should go next.  Maybe he should try the other bounty hunters who went after her?It's not until he pulls out onto the street does he glance in his rear view mirror, and when he finds those mischievous green eyes staring back at him he nearly runs his car off the road."Jesus!"  He cries, jerking the steering wheel to pull his car back into the right lane, his heart pounding.  Glaring at her through the mirror he snaps, "Stop trying to give me a bloody heart attack!"Even though he can't see her lips, the twinkle in her eyes tells him she's smirking.  Infuriating woman.  "If you would give up chasing me you wouldn't have a problem.""Not gonna happen," John replies, his mind racing.  Okay.  She's in his car.  All he has to do is drive to the station.  Then maybe his gun will be enough persuasion to get her to go with him inside.River leans forward in her seat and he finds he has the irrational thought to tell her to buckle her seatbelt.  Wisely, he keeps his mouth closed.  "So did you find what you were looking for, Doctor dear?"  She asks, and from what he can see out of the corner of his eye she looks genuinely curious."I found enough," he answers vaguely, and feels her raise her brows in response.  "You don't live there anymore," he states, earning a laugh from her.  "Of course I don't.""So where do you live?"River smiles.  "Isn't that supposed to be what you're trying to find out?"He stifles a grin.  "I thought maybe you would help me out a little.""Sorry, sweetie, you're on your own."At a stop light, he takes the brief moment to look at her face, admiring her features before he states, "You don't seem like a murderer.""And you don't seem like a bounty hunter."He almost answers, ' _I'm not_ ,' before catching himself, taking a moment to silently study her carefully blank expression before returning his attention to the road.  For the first time he begins to wonder if the charges against her are even true.His stomach churns at the thought so he quickly pushes it aside as he pulls up to the police station, his heart hammering as he quickly grabs his gun and turns to face her.  She almost looks disappointed as he points the gun at her, trying to affect an air of confidence.  "If you just go with me, we won't have a problem."His words convey a silent ultimatum- either she goes with him, or he shoots.  Instead of looking afraid, River only leans forward, the cold muzzle of the gun pressed to the skin at the center of her chest.  With her head titled, she gives him a slow smile, one that makes it feel like she knows him better than himself, and simply states, "You're not going to shoot me, sweetie."John swallows, knowing she's right but annoyed all the same.  "And how do you know that?""Because I'm not going to give you the chance."  And with that she's leaning in closer, giving him only enough time to draw in a startled breath before her lips are on his.  Her lips are soft, and for a moment his free hand flails before resting on the soft skin of her neck, registering the pounding of her pulse before pulling her closer, the gun forgotten and trapped between them.She tastes amazing, like everything deliciously forbidden, the kiss making him lightheaded.  But it's not until she pulls back and he opens his eyes to dizziness and blurry vision does he realize it wasn't the kiss at all, but her lipstick.  He doesn't even have time to mutter out an expletive before the poison takes over and everything turns black as he passes out.When he wakes, the sun is setting and River is gone- no surprise.  His mouth feels dry and his head is pounding as he sits up, groaning at his achy muscles.  Despite his discomfort and his embarrassment at having been bested, he smiles as he sees a note written in what must be her handwriting stuck to his steering wheel.  Coordinates, a date, signed with  _xx_.It seems like she's going to help him out after all.


	2. I love you 'cause your deuces are wild

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who is reading this, and to everyone who has commented! Honestly your comments mean soooo much and they keep me smiling like an idiot all day *hugs you all*
> 
> Chapter title from Deuces are Wild by Aerosmith

"It could be a trap!"  Amy argues, and John huffs, feeling like all he does with her anymore is squabble with her like she's his own mother.

"Oh it's probably most definitely a trap.""And you're still thinking about going?!""No.  I'm not  _thinking_  about it, I  _am_  going.""Wait.  Just wait," says Amy, holding out one hand in a halting gesture while the other comes to her forehead like he's giving her the biggest headache of her life.  "How do you even know it's from this River woman?""She gave it to me," John answers evasively, deciding there's no reason to mention her poisoning him.  With her lips.  A small smile flits across his lips at the thought, and oh god he is in so much trouble.Amy's eyes widen in surprise.  "You've  _met her_?!""Twice actually."His friend gives a small, slightly hysteric laugh.  "She could have killed you, John!""Calm down, Amelia.  She said she didn't want to kill me.""Oh.  Right.  The  _murderer_  you're trying to put in  _jail_  said she didn't want to kill you.  You're right, you're perfectly safe- I'm sure her word is as good as gold!"John narrows his eyes, frowning slightly.  "You know I think your accent gets even thicker when you're being sarcastic."Amy frowns suddenly.  "Wait.  If you've met her before-  _twice_ \- then why didn't you take her in?""She outsmarted me," he grumbles, though not feeling any of the actual resentment he should.Amy taps on the note with a green painted fingernail.  "And don't you think following these coordinates is just playing right into her hands?""Look.  At least it's something, which is a lot more than nothing- which is exactly what I would have without these coordinates!"Amy gives a sigh.  "Where do these coordinates take you anyway?""Azerbaijan."XxXThe city of Baku in Azerbaijan is unlike any other city in which he has ever been, an eclectic mixture of postmodern Western architecture interspersed with classically constructed Islamic buildings.  It's breathtaking, and John thinks that even if he doesn't complete his mission here that the trip will be well worth it.  The money he got from selling his car could have easily been spent on a couple of months' rent instead of funding the needs for this bounty job, but he's sincerely hoping the reward of this one mission will cover him for at least the next two years.River's note failed to list a time, so the day after his arrival he wakes with the sun that blares in oranges over the city.  Luckily, the coordinates takes him to a little cafe that has a translated menu in English, though the names of the food options still escape him.  Spices and the smell of freshly baked bread drift from inside and it's there, in a patio chair outside of the small cafe, that he sits and waits.As the morning passes, he sees a variety of different people that represent a wide range of cultures, never leaving him with a boring moment.  But by the time the sun is at its highest point in the sky, John begins to fidget, but it seems like today is going to be a test in patience because as the sun sets behind the towering buildings, leaving a beautiful sky full of dusky oranges, soft pinks and light purples, River has still yet to turn up.Night falls over the city, buildings lighting up and the city coming to life even more than it had during the day.  John watches as the Flame Towers put on their light show, a bit in awe as the artificial flames dance proudly up the buildings, demanding attention from miles away and seemingly lighting the city on fire against the backdrop of an inky sky."It's a beautiful city," comes that soft, low voice he has come to recognize, and he's proud of himself for not falling out of his chair in surprise at her sudden appearance.Pulling his attention away from the Towers, John focuses on the woman sitting in front of him, his heart suddenly going into overdrive because she is a vision all on her own.  "Yes," John agrees, though his mind is suddenly very far from the city around him.  "Beautiful."  Her dress seems to be a representation of the city itself, a wrap dress made of a variety of bright colors with a trim in shimmering gold and a modern cut that's low enough in the front to give him brief, tantalizing glimpses of cleavage, and the split in the wrap perfectly aligned to open over her legs when she crosses them.  Perhaps she's trying to kill him after all.Her smile is wide and genuine, her nose crinkling a bit, and John has to inwardly reprimand himself when he catches himself thinking it's adorable.  She's a murderer.  He's her recovery agent.  That is as far as their relationship can go."Why did you bring me here?"  John asks.River lifts one shoulder in a shrug, a brow arching as she watches him in contemplation.  "I actually didn't think you would show up."  She flashes a smile.  "Not after how we last parted, anyway."John finds himself grinning in response.  "Best poisoned kiss I've ever had."She laughs, a delighted sound that wraps warmly around his heart.  Distantly, he recognizes that he's beginning to drown in very deep water- or perhaps more appropriately, a river.  He grins inwardly at his own terrible pun."You're a strange man, Doctor," she notes, watching him as if she can get all the information from him that she needs with just a look.  "I did some research on you, you know."He raises a thin eyebrow and she continues, "Doctorate in physics.  Former professor, which explains the clothing," she adds with a wave of her hand to indicate his tweed and bow tie.  Frowning, he sits up taller and straightens his bow tie- his  _very cool_  bow tie.  "A number of noted discoveries and small inventions.  You've even written three books." River leans forward, her green eyes narrowing slightly as studies him.  "Nothing came up to indicate anything about  _bounty hunting_.""It's a new gig," he states in an offhanded tone, inwardly pleased as a look flashes briefly over her eyes that says she just can't quite figure him out."Well you seem terribly confident that you're going to succeed.""And you seem awfully confident that I'm not- which is strange as you keep putting yourself right in my path."A small smile twitches at the edges of her lips.  "It seems I can't help myself."He tugs at the lapels of his jacket, preening a bit as he gives her a grin.  "I have been told I'm irresistible."Her eyebrows shoot skyward.  "I think perhaps you were lied to, sweetie."John huffs petulantly, scowling a bit just to hear her laugh and vaguely wondering how he knew his pouting would illicit that response from her."I tried researching you too, you know."  He says.  "Unfortunately I couldn't find anything.""Well it would probably help you to have my real name," she states, smiling enigmatically as if she knows she has just peaked his interest.He leans forward, watching her carefully.  "Care to share, then?""Tell my real name to my own personal bounty hunter?"  River smiles, her nose crinkling from amusement in that way he adores.  "Sorry sweetie, I think I'll have to pass."John shrugs and sits back.  "It was worth a shot."  He pauses.  "So why are you here?""Business."  She states."Ah, yet another helpful response."River smiles but doesn't laugh like he expects ( _why_  even did he expect that?), choosing to watch him and giving off the feeling that she is internally warring with herself.  After a long moment she finally responds with, "Kovarian is in town."John's eyes widen.  "Isn't she after your head?""And I'm after hers."  For the first time since John has met her, he thinks he can see the murderer, her eyes cold and lacking their usual warmth, her mouth set in an unsettling grim line.He swallows thickly, wondering if he's about to cross a line as he asks, "Just like you wanted Father Octavian's?"For a brief second she looks hurt, as if he has physically wounded her, before her expression quickly turns into a carefully blank mask.  "He was a good man," is the only answer he gets, her response only serving to further confuse him.A small frown tugs at her lips and she stands.  "I should go."  John stands with her, wanting to reach out to her but restraining himself.  "Wait!  I'm sorry.  I-I didn't meant to- to bring up something I shouldn't have."  River wings up an eyebrow.  "Apologizing, bounty hunter?"  He shrugs a bit sheepishly, relieved to see her smirk back in place and not understanding why he was so desperate for its return.When she turns to make her exit, John reaches out and gently grabs her wrist to stop her, his long fingers wrapping over her pulse point.  Glancing down at his touch, she looks up at him expectantly and he grins.  "What?  I don't get a goodbye kiss this time?"A smile blooms across her lips, her eyes searching his face like he's a mystery that just keeps getting more difficult to solve.  He knows the feeling.His words were nothing short of teasing, so when she leans in, her hands splaying across his chest, he finds himself nearly as surprised as he was the first time.  Her perfume surrounds him in the scent he has begun to associate with only her, and his mind goes temporarily blank as her lips are pressed softly to the corner of his mouth in an almost-kiss that leaves him wanting more."See you around, sweetie," she says softly, turning and disappearing down the street without even a glance behind her, leaving him to stare after her and wonder what is happening to his heart.The next day as he checks his pockets before entering security at the Heydar Aliyev airport, his fingers wrap around a small slip of paper tucked away in the inside pocket of his jacket.  Unfolding it, he immediately recognizes her handwriting, his heart seeming to temporarily stop at the two words that become his next clue given to him by the very fugitive he's meant to be chasing. _Melody Pond_.XxX"Rose Tyler," John booms out as he sweeps into the blonde woman's office with a large grin.Glancing up from her position from behind her computer, the woman smiles at the sight of him.  "John!"  She exclaims as she stands to embrace him before waving him into a chair that sits in front of her rather impressive looking desk.  "It's been too long.""That it has," John agrees as they both take their seats.  "How's Stripes?"  He asks, receiving a fondly exasperated look from Rose at his personal nickname for her boyfriend.  But honestly, who ever even wears pinstriped suits?"Quite wonderful- we're actually getting married next month.""Really?! That's great!"  John enthuses, genuinely happy for the pair of them- they're a couple that has the  _it_  that most people look for but can never seem to find."So I know you're not just here to catch up," Rose says, smiling at him and earning an embarrassed laugh.  "I'm actually in need of a favor," speaks John as he plops the folder in his hands on top of her desk."Sliding the red folder closer to her, Rose opens it, frowning as her eyes skim the contents inside.  "River Song," she reads, looking up at John in question.He nods.  "Real name is Melody Pond.  I need as much information on her as you can find.""I dunno, John," Rose says as she looks back down at the folder.  "I'm not supposed to give out information outside of the office.""I know," he replies, looking at her pleadingly.  "I wouldn't ask if it wasn't important."Worrying her bottom lip, Rose considers him silently before finally sighing in defeat.  "I'll email you whatever I find later tonight.""Brilliant!"  John exclaims.  "You're a life saver."XxXFeeling even more motivated than normal, John reenters the pawn shop he purchased his gun from just earlier last week.  When he approaches the pixi-looking brunette behind the counter- Clara, if he remembers her name correctly- she frowns and greets him with, "We don't do refunds.""Not here for a refund," John replies and she immediately brightens.  "Then what can I do you for?""I need to look at all of your defense items."Her frown makes a reappearance as she gives him a significant look.  "We don't sell defense items here."John looks at her in confusion.  He most definitely bought a firearm from her last week.  It may not have been exactly  _legal_ , but that was far from the poin- oh.  "Ah.  Yes.  You  _don't_  sell anything categorized as weapons here.   _Especially_  not guns."  He gives her wink to let her know he remembers that he's supposed to keep it hush hush, and she only shakes her head at him like he embarrasses her.Giving a put upon sigh, she moves to the back of the shop, signaling for him to follow her into the back room.  The room isn't necessarily small, but the amount of filing cabinets makes it seem that way.  Just like the main portion of the shop, it smells like dusty artifacts and tarnished metals, something that strangely puts him at ease as the woman shoos him into the corner of room by a black filing cabinet.Keys give a happy jingle as she selects one and unlocks the cabinet- pulling out one big drawer that holds four separate shelves containing a rather impressive array of weapons.  Most of them look too dangerous for him to even begin to consider, and he sighs, feeling a bit disappointed."Do you have anything that won't...I dunno... _kill_  somebody?""So are you looking to seriously injure, inflict minor wounds, stun, what?"  Clara crosses her arms, looking far more intimidating than he would have previously imagined, considering her small stature and flowery dresses."Erm...stun?""This is the only thing I have," she says, reaching out and picking out a small tube that looks reminiscent of breath spray.  Holding the small container in his hand, John frowns at it.  "What does it do?""Spray it in someone's face and they're unconscious within five seconds."His brows lift and he smiles.  "That sounds perfect really."Humming skeptically, Clara gives him a once over before cheekily adding, "Just make sure you don't accidentally use it on yourself."XxXWith his new stun-spray tucked securely in his jacket pocket and information on Melody Pond on the way, John feels more confident about this mission than ever before.  Something deep inside him churns uncomfortably at the thought of handing River over to the authorities, but he chooses to dismiss it- just because she's absolutely stunning and has the strange power to make his insides go wibbly doesn't mean he's going to give up this job.  All he has to do is forget about her smile and her laugh and her ability to infuriate him in a way that he loves way more than he would ever admit.  Easy.John enters his flat just after nightfall, kicking the door shut behind him and navigating through the small space to his bedroom by the light shining through his window from the nearby street lamp.  Flicking on his bedside lamp, he haphazardly kicks off his boots and sheds his tweed before grabbing his laptop and plopping on his bed.  The light from his computer screen seems to be as bright as the sun, causing him to squint and grumble until he finds the right button to dim it down.  After a few minutes of fighting with his email login over the password, his inbox is loaded and a grin works his way up his cheeks as he sees:   _Rose Tyler    Subject:  Melody Pond (you owe me!)_ He'll make sure to get her and Stripes a nice wedding gift, he thinks as he downloads the attachment that comes in the email, his heart suddenly beating twice as fast as it opens.  Anything dealing with River Song seems to have that effect on him.As River's story unfolds in front of him, the smile on his face slowly disappears.Melody Pond was the name was given to her at an orphanage where she lived from birth until the age of eight.  A black and white picture accompanies the information, showing a thin girl in clothing that can only be described as rags.  If he didn't know any better he would deny that this was a picture of the woman who lives with a smirk on her face, the young girl looking solemn, her skin dirty and her curls just one giant messy tangle on her head.  Behind her is a picture of the orphanage, an iron sign proclaiming it to be Greystark Hall.Information on Greystark follows and John learns of the orphanage being closed due to the caretaker being mentally unstable.  John compares Greystark's closing date to the date Melody left the Orphanage and finds it to be the same.  His heart constricts as he realizes the only place for her to have gone would have been the streets.There is a seven year gap and then a mug shot accompanied by a record of her first arrest at the age of fifteen.  There is something about her that seems absolutely wild and untamed- her hair frizzy and those mischievous green eyes lined heavily in black.  She smiles brazenly at the camera as if to say ' _You may have caught me, but I still won_.'A smile works its way across his lips despite himself and he outright laughs as he reads that her crime was stealing a bus and driving it through the Royal Botanic Gardens.  She's quoted with saying that she was 'only taking a shortcut.'His amusement disappears as his eyes skim over the record and land on the person who paid her bail.   _Father Octavian_.  John swallows heavily.  So that's how she got in with Kovarian.She's in her early twenties in the last section of information and is now going by River Song.  It's another arrest record, but this time she looks different.  Not so much physically, but emotionally.  There is a depth in her eyes that wasn't there before- like she's seen more than her fair share of bad things in the short span of her life.  This time she's in jail for seven years.John slowly closes his laptop and stares blankly at the wall opposite him.  He's learned a lot, but at the same time he feels as if he has learned nothing.  River-  _Melody-_  is still just as much of a complicated mystery as she was before he obtained this information.  Perhaps even more so now.Sighing, John tosses his laptop next to him on the empty space of his bed before standing and giving a large yawn as he stretches.  It's been a long day.Trudging to the bathroom, he feels considerably less confident than he had been upon walking into his flat.  He was rather hoping the information he received on Melody was going to shed all the light he needed.Flipping on the light switch, he is startled to find writing scrawled across his bathroom mirror in bright red lipstick.   _Blueprint Cafe_ _.  Tomorrow.  8pm._   Just next to the time is a print of lips in the same red, and he grins as he imagines River applying it and bending forward to kiss the mirror.John glances at the clock hanging on the wall and thinks about the stun-spray still in his jacket.  This time tomorrow his curly haired fugitive could be back behind bars for the third time and his wallet could be full.  All he has to do is keep his heart in check.XxXThe Blueprint Cafe sits on the river Thames, its floor to ceiling windows giving John quite the view as he patiently waits on River to make her no doubt sudden appearance.  So at a quarter past eight she surprises him as she's shown to their table by a waiter, looking resplendent in a floor length, shimmering green dress."Decided not to try to give me a heart attack this time, then?"She smiles at him, her face lighting up in a way that makes it seem like she's been looking forward to their meeting almost just as much as he has.  If it causes his heart to stop, well, no one knows it except for him."Not this time- but who knows?"  Her smile turns into a smirk.  "The night is still young.  I'm sure I could manage other ways to throw your heart into overdrive."He feels heat prickling at the skin of his cheeks at the suggestive tone of her voice, and he would grumble about it but then that smile of hers he loves so much makes a reappearance.  "You blush so prettily, sweetie."Fondly exasperated, he points at her.  "And you, River Song, have no shame."She raises a delicate shoulder to convey her lack of concern at his playful condemnation."But," he continues, watching her carefully, "I suppose I'll let it slip.  Especially with it being your birthday."  A sense of triumph fills him as he watches her eyes widen briefly in surprise, her lips parting slightly just before she slides her careful mask back into place.  For a moment she only watches him, John unable to tell what's running through her mind."You're quicker at gathering information than I would have guessed, Doctor," she finally speaks and he grins proudly, preparing to respond when they are interrupted by their waiter.  They both order, and by the time the waiter retreats John has forgotten his response, choosing instead to ask, "Is this a birthday date, then?"River snorts, taking a moment to sip at her water.  "I've never really celebrated the day."A certain sadness fills his chest at the information, his thoughts briefly going back to the young, sad looking Melody that spent her childhood years in the orphanage.  Forcing a smile, he teases, "So it's just a normal date, then?"Leaning forward, River places her elbows on the table and gives him a curious smile.  "You're meant to be hunting me, Doctor, not  _dating_  me.""Well it hasn't been much of a hunt, has it?"Her eyes narrow slightly as she leans back in her seat.  "Why haven't you tried taking me in yet?""I have.  And then you poisoned me, remember?"Her face brightens, amusement shining in her eyes.  "Oh that was an actual attempt?""Oi!"She laughs, and John can't help the smile that spreads across his face in return."You could call the police right now, you know," River points out."I'm biding my time," he answers.  "Besides, I'm sure you would manage to get away regardless if it was two men or twenty."Their meal comes and they continue their light banter over a good dinner and an even better shared dessert.  When the bill comes, River insists on paying for the entire thing, despite his protests that it's  _her birthday_.  "I'm the one who asked you to meet me here, honestly, Doctor," she says with a light laugh as she pulls her credit card from her wallet, something that looks like a plane ticket catching John's eye as she does so.When she excuses herself to pop to the restroom, John watches her disappear around the corner and leaps for her wallet.  Glancing hastily in the direction she disappeared, John unsnaps it and finds a single ticket resting in the middle. _Heathrow Airport, London, England >>> Budapest Ferenc Liszt International Airport, Budapest, Hungary.  One-way._Heart beating from the fear of being caught snooping through her things, John hastily pulls out his mobile and snaps a photo of the ticket so he can have the information for later.  Perhaps he's getting better at this whole bounty hunting thing.By the time she comes back, her wallet is in exactly the same spot and she doesn't suspect a thing.As they leave, John offers her his arm, earning a pleasantly surprised smile before she hesitantly slips her arm through his.  "Do you always offer your arm to the fugitives you're chasing?"  She asks as they begin to walk down the sidewalk, the river Thames at their side.  John smiles down at her, repressing the sudden urge to sweep a curl behind her ear.  "Only if it's their birthday," he teases softy.For a few moments they walk in silence with no particular destination in mind, weaving between other passersby but never separating from one another.  "Do you always make a point to have dinner with your bounty hunters?"River purses her lips against a smile, only answering with,  "You intrigue me."  He takes that as a no.A smug smile tugs at his lips.  "So I  _am_  your date, then."River laughs softly, a light sound that lifts his heart.  Considering her past, he wonders how many people have had the privilege of hearing it.  "If we were together you would be  _much_  more than just my date, Doctor.""Oh?"  He asks, knowing his inquiry is going to lead to him blushing just from the smirk that is already gracing her lips."I believe the appropriate term would be  _lover_."  Her words are practically a purr, low and seductive in his ear, and he can't help the shiver that races down his spine.  This woman is trying to kill him.When he risks a glance at her, he finds her own eyes are darkened with a desire he knows is reflected in his own.  Their walk slows to a halt, John wanting nothing more than to pull her close and kiss her, though ultimately deciding against it for fear of ending up unconscious on the ground.When the soft strains of a Stevie Wonder ballad reach his ears from across the street, a slow smile works its way across his lips.  River only has time to look at him curiously before he makes the decision to pull her flush against him, one hand resting on her waist and the other lacing her fingers with his own.  For a moment she tenses at his touch, but when he starts to gently sway them to the music she huffs out a laugh."Don't laugh, Song," he speaks in a whisper.  "You have to have your birthday dance.""That's not a thing," she protests even as she tucks her head in the space between his neck and shoulder, her curls tickling his skin.The palm at her waist smooths over the silky fabric of her dress to rest at her lower back, and he finds himself wondering if she can feel the erratic beating of his heart.  The lights from the Tower Bridge reflect onto the water, making it feel like the Thames is dancing with them beneath the city lights, and John briefly thinks he has never experienced a more perfect moment.  That is, right up until River lifts her head and seeks out his lips with her own and suddenly the music, the people, the city itself, ceases to exist.  His hands move to gently cup her face, his thumbs softly brushing over the apples of her cheeks as he kisses her and yes,  _this_  is the most perfect moment.When they part, her arm takes its place back through his and they simply resume walking, her head on his shoulder and neither of them daring to breathe a word.  John looks down at her, feeling the warmth of her pressed into his side and only able to see the tops of her curls, and suddenly realizes that he is no longer the owner of his heart.An odd ache settles in chest because what he wants is something he shouldn't.  And it is definitely something he  _cannot_  have, regardless of these small moments.  But as River glances up at him and offers him a small smile that seems to weaken him just a bit, all of the  _do's and don'ts_  no longer seem to really matter in that second.  He isn't a bounty hunter and she isn't a fugitive.  He is just a clumsy idiot and she is the woman he can't help but stumble after.As if simply reaffirming his revelation, when he returns to his flat after bidding her goodnight, he spots the stun spray resting on the counter top in his kitchen.  He hadn't even taken it with him.XxX"You  _kissed_  her?!"  Once again Amy's voice is at a pitch that makes his ears want to close in on themselves, her expression disbelieving as she gapes at him."Technically  _she_  kissed  _me_.  Twice.  Well- three times if you count Azerbaijan."Amy arches a perfectly shaped eyebrow.  "And that doesn't make you at all suspicious?"John frowns.  "What do you mean?"With her hand pressed to her forehead, Amy heaves out a sigh that implies she thinks he is being particularly dense.  "She's a murderer!  She's just trying to soften you up, get you to let your guard down.""I don't believe that."Rory sits on the other side of the kitchen table, leaning forward and speaking for the first time since the subject of River Song has been brought up.  "Why not?"  It's a simple question, but John can tell from the weight of his gaze that he's expecting a convincing answer.John flounders for a moment, looking between his two friends and feeling slightly defeated before finally answering, "Because when she looks at me, she looks just as lost as I feel when I look at her."Amy gives him a skeptical look.  "Are you saying you love her?"At the word  _love_ , John's heart suddenly finds its way into his throat.  This is why he feels lost every time he sees her or even  _thinks_  of her.  What does it even mean to love someone the way he wants to love River Song?"You can't  _love_  her, John!"  Amy protests at his silence.  "You've only met her a handful of times!"Despite that he's had the same thought, John finds himself rebelling anyway, prepared to argue when Rory interjects and does the arguing for him.  "I loved you the moment I met you," Rory speaks softly to Amy, his words causing her to deflate."You can't seriously be taking his side here."Rory says nothing, only watching her patiently until she looks significantly defeated.  "Fine," she says, turning to John and giving him a look that tells him whatever she says next is going to be something on which he doesn't get a say.  "I want to meet her."XxXHis friends are hosting a dinner.  Tonight.  For him and his curly haired fugitive.  John laughs to himself, the noise having an edge of hysteria.  This is  _insane_.  And even if it wasn't, he has no idea how to even  _find_  River- she's the one that always does the finding.  Ironic really, considering that  _he_  is supposed to be the bounty hunter.Knowing that going out and looking for her is doubtful to produce results, he set out yesterday evening and left brightly colored post-it notes all over London that read-  _Dinner?  -the Doctor_.  The chances that she'll find one, recognize it's for her, and actually agree is slim to none.John glances up at the clock that hangs on the wall and begins to impatiently fidget- the dinner is in one hour.Just as even more doubt begins to creep in, a soft knock comes from his door, sending John rushing to open it.  River stands there, looking hesistant and holding a bright pink post-it between her fingers.  She smiles at him and it feels as if the air has left his lungs in one sudden breath."This for me, then?"  She asks, waving the post-it.  John nods, letting her walk into his flat and closing the door behind him.  He's rather surprised she didn't try another reappearing trick.She turns on him with sudden suspicion in her eyes.  "How did you know where I was going to be today?"John grins, feeling proud of himself.  "I didn't.  I left a couple hundred all over London."River stares at him, her expression curiously blank, prompting a sudden nervousness to well up inside him.  "What?""How long did you spend?""What?"  He repeats, feeling confused." _How long did you spend_?  Buying and writing and  _leaving_  those notes all over London?"John gives an evasive shrug.  "A few hours, I guess.""You spent  _hours_  doing that just to ask me to dinner?"  Though her face is still blank, her tone is incredulous.  He responds only with a nod of his head, his confirmation causing her expressionless mask to crumble and be replaced by one that holds a soft endearment meant only for him.Unable to stand not touching her any longer, John tenderly swipes a curl behind her ear, smiling softly at her.  He leans in, pleased as she sways toward him, as if pulled to him by some magnetic force.  His thumb brushes lightly across her bottom lip and he delights in the way her eyes flutter shut.  "Not wearing any poison lipstick today are you?"The corner of her lips twitches in amusement.  "Just shut up and kiss me."  All too happily, he obliges.Her kisses are like the sun and thunder all at once- warm, but with enough power to rattle his bones.  Every movement of her lips against his is full of deliberate softness, like she has all the time in the world to dedicate to kissing him.  If he could spend his life receiving kisses from River Song, there is possibly nothing in the universe that would make him happier.When they break apart, she stays in his arms, head tucked under his chin and curls tickling the skin of his neck and chin.  "John, what are we doing?"The question seems to hold a heavier weight than any other question he has ever been asked.  He doesn't know if it's because of how small and unsure her voice is, or if it's because she used his name.  His actual proper name- not  _Doctor_  or  _sweetie_."I don't know," he answers, because he really  _really_  doesn't.His response seems to prompt her into motion, causing her to suddenly jerk out of his arms, her face full of a confusion he knows well- he may not ever be able to see it on his own face, but he feels it every time he thinks of her when she isn't around."You're a  _bounty hunter_.  Chasing  _me_.""And  _you_  are a wanted murderer," he replies, feeling suddenly defensive even though it seems more like she's speaking to herself.Her eyes snap to his at his words, a sudden fire there that makes him want to take a step back.  "I didn't kill him.""What?  So you expect to believe that Kovarian and her gang of lackeys in the the police are just after you for no reason?"Between one second and the next she goes from looking at him like he has fatally wounded her to replacing her expression with that same carefully blank mask.  If anything, that is what scares him into realizing that maybe being on the defense in this situation wasn't his best course of action."River-" he tries, but is cut off by her icy, "Go to hell,  _Doctor_ ," before she pushes past him."River, wait!"  He calls as he follows her, his heart suddenly beating in overtime because he knows that his chances of finding her once she walks out that door is close to zero if he doesn't fix things."No.  I'm not  _waiting_ ," she says rigidly as she whirls on him.  "I am  _not_  going back to jail, and staying here is only putting me in more danger.  The only reason I haven't left yet is because of you- with your stupid hair, and your stupid bow tie and your stupid  _smile_.  I don't even know you!  But I thought..."  She trails off, rubbing at her sternum as if there is some invisible pain there.  "It doesn't matter.  You're a bounty hunter and that isn't likely to change.  You're dangerous to me, Doctor."John shakes his head emphatically in denial.  "No.  River.  Don't leave."  When he takes a step toward her, he is met with a spray to the face that causes him to immediately double over, knees crackling as they hit the floor and his lungs heaving out deep coughs.  She must have grabbed his stun spray when he wasn't looking.The last thing he sees before passing out on his kitchen floor is her boots walking out of his door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm in the process of moving out of my apartment so the next chapter won't be up until Saturday after all the craziness is behind me
> 
> Thank you for reading<3 <3 <3


	3. All I wanted is someone I can't resist

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I said I would have this chapter up earlier today but moving apartments proved to be quite the task (with it being 95 and stormy in Charleston, let's just say it took longer than we originally planned lol). So sorry for the delay! Though technically it's still Saturday in the rest of the Western Hemisphere- that counts right??? 
> 
> I can't even begin to express how much love I have for all of you reading this story! Thanks for sticking with it this far!!!
> 
> Chapter title from Cryin' by Aerosmith

His eyes fly open as he startles awake, bolting into sitting position and belatedly realizing he is drenched in ice cold water.  Amy stands over him, two empty glasses in her hands and Rory standing behind her with another two full glasses of water, looking hesitant.

"Bloody hell," John grumbles, pressing a palm against his aching head and trying to avoid the look Amy is giving him.Setting the two glasses on the counter, Amy places her hands on her hips and narrows her eyes at him.  "Care to tell us what happened, Raggedy Man?"John closes his eyes, as if his friends and his sudden heartache could suddenly disappear if he could just manage to block everything out.  After a moment he sighs and finally answers, "She left.""...Okay," Amy says slowly.  "But how does that end up with you unconscious on your kitchen floor?"John swipes his wet hair out of his eyes in a frustrated movement.  "She stunned me and  _then_  left, okay?"Rory helps John to his feet as Amy tries for a lighter tone, sensing that he's on edge.  "I knew she might not have been that willing to come to dinner, but knocking you out was a bit excessive don't you think?"Rory raises his brow at her.  "Well she is a murderer, Amy.""She's  _not_ ," John bites out, garnering surprised looks from both of his friends.  His shoulders slump, thinking about the wounded expression on River's face when he accused her.  "I pushed her too hard for information, but I am at least one hundred percent sure she didn't kill Octavian."Amy frowns at him.  "So what are you going to do?"The space where his heart used to be feels suddenly more empty than he ever thought possible.  John sighs.  "I don't know."XxXSince the moment River first confronted him in his flat, smelling of jasmine and wearing a smirk that was dangerous to his heart, John knew he would never be able to put her behind bars- he was in far too deep even then.  Had it been anyone else he just might have been able to do the job, but it hadn't been anyone else, it had been  _her_.  So he chooses to give up bounty hunting, much to his wallet's eternal sadness and Mr. Lux's smug satisfaction.  The only thing bounty hunting brought him was a broken heart and an even more impatient landlord.Feeling decidedly defeated, John trudges his way into a temp agency and three days later finds him sitting in a law firm office doing secretarial work."Oi!"  Fingers snap in front of his face, jolting him from his sulk.  "Earth to Spaceman!""What?"  John snaps out to his co-worker, a feisty redhead who occupies the only other secretary job at this small firm.She narrows her eyes at him.  "I didn't ask for attitude, did I?"Deflating, John sighs.  "Sorry, Donna.  I've just...not been myself lately."Her face softens a bit.  "Look, I don't really care if you do your job or not- that's not on me.  But those bloody useless lawyers in their overly large offices refuse to get their own coffee- that's on you, Spaceman."John heaves out a sigh and stands from his position behind the desk, trudging off to the lounge to make a round of coffee.  And for the next week that's how it goes- John dragging through life with forceful nudges from Donna to keep him on track.That next Wednesday he is being particularly grumpy, his mind seeming unable to get the image of shining green eyes and riotous curls out of his head for even ten minutes at a time."You're turning in a grouchy old man."John starts at Donna's voice, looking over to where she sits beside him at the reception desk, her glare fastened on him.  "You're always in such a bad mood.  Care to share with the class?""Not really," John mumbles."What?  Did the Old Man Store run out of terrible bow ties and itchy tweed?"John gasps, pointing a finger at her.  "My tweed is perfectly non-itchy!  And bow ties are  _cool_.""Uh-huh."He huffs, turning back to his computer and angrily clicking around with no purpose until he finally sighs.  "It's a woman.""Sounds like trouble already," Donna muses, turning completely from her work to give him her full attention.A small, wistful smile crosses his lips.  "Oh she was definitely trouble."  He pauses.  "She left."Donna watches him knowingly.  "And you love her?"John only nods in response, his heart constricting and feeling heat rising to his cheeks as tears prickle behind his eyes- what has River Song turned him into?Donna laughs.  "She's turned you into a mess, that's what."Oh.  He definitely meant to  _think_  that, not say it out loud."Why did she leave?""I scared her off."  He's been turning over their last encounter for days, trying to figure out what exactly it was that made her leave.  As soon as he says the words out loud, he knows it's true. Neither one of them exactly come from a background full of love, so how are either of them supposed to react when they actually find it?  He scares her, just as badly as she scares him."Why haven't you gone after her?"John shrugs evasively.  "I dunno...I have things to do.  Rent to pay."Donna purses her lips, looking at him like he has disappointed her.  Her eyes narrow as she contemplates him, her fingers tapping in rhythm on the desk.  "What was she like?""Amazing," John answers instantly, even though a single word, or even a  _million_  words, fails to do her justice."Well it seems like you have two options. Either you can keep living this mediocre life with this mediocre job to pay rent on a mediocre flat, or you can go after her.  And have amazing."John swallows tightly.  "I want amazing."Donna grins, looking proud of herself.  "Of course you do.  Go get her, Spaceman."XxXThe new determination Donna gave him lasts for about three days.  On a rash impulse he had walked out on the only job that would give him a chance, and now he's beginning to regret the decision.  He has put all his time and effort into trying to find River, but to no avail.  The only reason he ran into her so many times before was because she wanted it.  Now he understands that if River Song doesn't want to be found, she won't be.  Simple as that."Maybe she'll turn up," suggests Amy in a light tone that tells him she doubts the very words coming out of her mouth, but is trying to give him hope regardless."Have you checked all the places you've been with her before?"  Asks Rory.John nods.  "I've checked  _everywhere_.  Done everything.  I even left her a note in the bloody Daily Telegraph!""She might not have seen it.  No one reads the newspaper anymore, mate."Shooting her husband a glare, Amy sinks down onto the sofa beside John and places a gentle hand on his shoulder.  "Maybe this is a good thing.  Like the universe giving you a sign or something, yeah?"John narrows his eyes at her implications.  "What kind of sign?""You know...just...maybe it's just better for you to move on?"He shakes his head in adamant denial.  "No.   _No_.  All I have to do is find her- if I can just do that then I can figure out the rest."Rory frowns.  "Well maybe she's not even in London anymore.  You said that the only reason she was even still here was because of you."John gasps, shooting to his feet.  "Budapest.  Oh god, I've been  _so thick_!"  He can practically feel the mania behind his eyes as he turns to his friends and explains, "That night- we had dinner and she popped off to the loo and I did some snooping and there was a plane ticket to Budapest in her wallet!  I have to go."  And with that he is gone, shooting out of his friends' front door and waving behind him as they confusingly call after him.  He can't wait another minute, every second that passes is another second that she could be traveling further and further away from him.When he rushes into his flat, he pulls out his mobile and swipes though his photo gallery until he finds the picture of her ticket.  As his eyes skim over the vague flight information, his heart sinks a bit as he realizes her plane would have landed in Hungary late yesterday evening.  Who knows if she's even still there?Pushing his doubt aside, John powers on his laptop and finds the next flight to Budapest.  He grins- maybe this time it will be him surprising her.XxXBy the time he lands in Budapest it is well gone two in the morning.  Despite his best efforts to take in the gorgeous surroundings as his cab driver takes him to his hotel, John can't help the heavy tiredness of his eyelids and ultimately ends up dozing off.  The concierge at his hotel doesn't speak a bit of English, but after a few minutes of frustrating exchanges he finally manages to get a room.  The moment his head hits the pillow he is asleep, dreaming of curls and the hope that comes with tomorrow.The early morning sun filters through the window of his small hotel room, shining in his eyes and pulling him from his sleep.  For a moment he only stares at the ceiling with a quiet sigh, trying to not get discouraged before he even begins.  But honestly, what are the chances of him finding her?Swinging his legs over the edge of the bed, John scrubs his hands wearily over his face.  He at least has to try.  A month ago he never even knew River Song existed, but now he's unsure how to go back to life that doesn't include her.As he steps out onto the street and is met with the bright Hungarian sun, he realizes he has no idea where to even begin.  He settles to start with breakfast at a cafe that overlooks the Danube, a map of the city sprawled out before him.  Glancing out over the sparkling water to the other side, he takes in the image of the parliament building that sits on the river's edge and dwarfs everything around it, and quickly concludes that he is in the Buda side of the city.  Nodding to himself, John circles his location before further scrutinizing the map, taking in every detail of the city and trying to put himself in River's shoes.For a moment he can only stare helplessly at the map.  No where is safe from Kovarian, so would River be hiding in plain sight by blending in with the crowds of people in Pest, or would she choose to disappear among the hills and ancient structures of Buda?Knowing what he does about River, he can make cases for why she would be in either side of the city.  Ultimately he decides on Pest.  It is more difficult to hide in a crowd, but if done successfully it would also be more difficult to be found.  John sighs, the true difficulty of his task finally weighing his shoulders.  It was different when he was looking for her as a job.  If he succeeded he was paid an outrageous amount of money, otherwise he was only just right back where he started.  But now it's different.  Now his heart is on the line.Frustration settles even as he narrows down his search to half of the city, not feeling a bit closer to finding River than when he started.  The only thing that saves him from hurling his map into the river and sulking back to his hotel is the arrival of his breakfast.  The pancakes he ordered look similar to the ones he gets in London, but the rich chocolate sauce and the chestnut filling has him almost moaning aloud from the delicious, slightly eccentric taste.He is halfway through his meal, still studiously ignoring the map and everything that comes with it, when his mobile vibrates in his pocket.  Letting his fork drop with a  _clank_  against the plate, John digs in the pocket of his tweed and pulls out his mobile, his heart nearly stalling as he reads the notification screen. _One new message from River Song._ John swallows.  How did she even manage to swipe his mobile long enough to add herself as a contact?  Ignoring the slight shaking of his hand and the hope rising in his chest, he swipes his thumb across the screen to open the message. _47.4911°N, 19.0628°E.  Come as soon as you can.  x_ With a few speedy taps from his thumbs and a little help from Google he quickly identifies the coordinates as the Hungarian National Museum.  His heart pounds as his head snaps up to look across the river to Pest- she's just on the other side of the bridge.  Immediately he is on his feet, throwing a few Hungarian bills he still hasn't got the hang of onto the table to hopefully cover the expense of his breakfast.Though he sprints to the streets, hand raised in a hail, it still takes far longer than he would like for a cab to pull over.  "The National Museum," John pants as he hops inside, making a frustrated noise as the driver stares blankly back at him through the rear view mirror.  When he was in university he spent a lot of his free time becoming fluent in many other languages.  Hungarian wasn't one of them.Floundering a moment, John desperately pulls out his phone and brings up a picture of the museum, shoving it under the driver's nose.  For a moment he waits with bated breath until the driver nods and pulls out onto the busy street.With nothing but anxiousness left to occupy him, John bounces his leg in agitation and turns River's text over in his mind.  Why would she send him a message?  Does she even know he's in Budapest?  And why, regardless of it's calm tone, does he feel like it has an underlying note of panic?His fingers tapping rapidly against his knee, John glares at the interior of the car- why exactly wasn't teleportation a mode of transportation yet?A sufficient distraction from his impatience is found in the statued lions that lounge on either side of the entrance to the Chain Bridge, an impressive sight John has to wonder at even in his anxiety.  The car windows offer a view of the Danube rushing beneath them as they cross the bridge into Pest, John forcing himself to focus on the sights around him and not the uncertainty that awaits him at his destination.The cab stops directly in front of the museum, John tossing a fist full of money at the driver before hopping out.  The museum stands proudly before him, its neo-classical white pillars and hand-molded embellishments speaking of a culture that has long past but is still being dutifully preserved.The jog up the stone steps winds him more than he cares to admit, panting a bit as he enters through the large wooden doors and into the relatively crowded museum.  It smells like history and looks like a palace, everything from the displays, to the art, to the ceiling, portraying a proud culture of elegance.  At the moment, none of that matters to John as he weaves through people, climbing staircases and time passing far too quickly as he frantically searches for that head of curls.It's not until he dejectedly returns to the first floor does he notice something that peaks his interest- a rather large looking bloke guarding a single set of stairs that leads downward.  It just reeks of trouble, and John reasons that wherever there is trouble, River Song is soon to follow.Patience has never really been his thing, but John forces himself to slowly walk through the first floor, pretending to be interested in the displays as he keeps an eye on the guard and waits for his opportunity.  More time passes and John's impatience gets the best of him as he decides to make his own opportunity.  All it takes is a well timed toss of his boot across the room- honestly he doesn't  _mean_  to hit that short guy in the back of the head, but the guard leaves his post to check out the situation with a frown on his face, so John sends out a silent apology and reasons that it was a necessary sacrifice.He feels a bit ridiculous as he descends the stairs in one shoe, the light tapping of his single boot on the marble floor giving off an uneven echo that sounds louder than it really is.  The murmur of the mingling museum patrons on the above floors fades as he reaches the bottom of the stairs, a heavy looking door being the only thing to occupy the space now across from him.  John presses his ear against the cool metal of the door, listening with bated breath for any sign of movement.  After a moment of hearing nothing but silence, he glances behind him, swallows heavily, and puts all of his weight into sliding open the door.The room that lies beyond is nothing short of massive, taking up the entire floor.  There are figures and what must be paintings and other artifacts hidden under heavy cloths, dust seeming to cling most everything."Storage," John mutters to himself, navigating slowly around the items.  When his curiosity takes him into a side room, his breathing, his heart,  _everything_  inside of him just seems to halt at the sight in front of him."River," he breathes.She turns, a brief flash of fear in her eyes that vanishes and is replaced by surprise at the sight of him.  Ah.  So she  _didn't_  know he was in Budapest.John smirks, feeling oddly proud as he skims his fingers through the hair at the side of his head and swaggers toward her, invading her space.  "Sorry I'm late, honey.  The cab drivers here aren't particularly fast."Joy fills him as he watches her repress a smile.  "Got my message then?"He nods, leaning back a bit to admire the black dress that clings to her curves and does sinful things to her cleavage.  And honestly, it's such a distracting sight that it takes his brain a moment to register the handcuff around her wrist, the other side attached to the wrist of an angel statue that is a fair bit taller, and definitely far more ominous looking than both of them combined."Sorry, sweetie," River speaks.  "But this is far less kinky than I would have if it were you, me, and handcuffs in a room."His lips lift in a small smile as his eyebrows raise at her statement.  "You bad, bad girl."She smirks.  "Oh you have no idea,  _Doctor_."  She all but purrs out the title, sending a shiver down his spine.  God he's missed her.Forcing himself to look away from her before he does something idiotic like confess his undying love, he glances around the room, seeing similar statues to the one she is cuffed to and his brow lifting in surprise as he notes an unconscious fellow lying at her feet.  Poor sod.  It was probably that lipstick she loves so much."Care to explain any of this to me, dear?"She smiles, amusement shining in her eyes despite her current predicament.  "Well I was thinking you could help me get out of this mess and then we could just go from there.""Good plan," John agrees, tapping her affectionately on the nose, happiness blooming in his chest at the soft smile that is his reward.Spinning on his heels, John claps his hands together as his eyes scan the space for something useful.  "I don't suppose you happen to have the key?  That would make things infinitely easier."  When he glances over his shoulder, he has to force himself to repress a grin at the considerably unamused look gracing her face.  "Sweetie, if I had the key I would most definitely not be standing here right now.""Just wanted to make sure," he mumbles, pulling the drop cloths from statues and cabinets and large paintings.  "Aha!"  He exclaims, picking up a large, iron sword that shows centuries of age and is far heavier than he would ever openly admit."What're you doing?" River asks hesitantly, eying the sword in his hands."Chop off the hand of the statue and you're free," John answers simply."Wait!"  She cries out as he lifts the weapon, frowning at him before looking wistfully at the statue before her.  "This is history, you can't just  _destroy_  it."John huffs.  "What? Are you an archaeologist now?""I could be!  It would be fun!"He snorts.  "If by fun you actually mean exhaustingly boring, I couldn't agree more, dear."River glares at him, and though he's sure the look is supposed to instill some sort of fear it only makes him grin.  "I have to do this, okay?"  John waits for her less than happy agreement before throwing his strength into lifting the sword and bringing it crashing down on the statue's arm.  The stone crumbles from the single blow,  the hand shattering the moment it hits the ground, leaving River free.John drops the sword, prepared to give River a smug smile and surprised when he suddenly finds himself with his arms full of her, her lips pressed against his and her hands cradling his face.  His arms pull her as close to him as possible as he returns the kiss, the warmth of her pressed against him nearly enough to bring tears to his eyes- the possibility of him never having this again had been so very real."Missed you," River whispers against his lips and his heart sings at the words."You're the one who ran off," he counters softly, looking at her sadly as he tucks a wayward curl behind her ear.River sighs, straightening his bow tie and looking like she's about to offer some sort of apology or explanation, but is interrupted by the sound of the storage room door sliding open.  Her eyes widen as she grabs his hand and tugs him with her to hide behind an absolutely massive, ornately carved china cabinet.  "Wha-" he starts, but is silenced by her hand covering his mouth, the hard look she gives him perfectly conveying her want for him to stay silent.From their hiding spot they have a vantage point of watching the new intruders enter the room.  A woman with a curious looking eye patch steps into the space, glancing around and seeming unimpressed by what she sees.  Four incredibly tall, incredibly thin men with almost sickly pale complexions and decked in pristine black suits follow her inside.  "She's just through here, Madame Kovarian," one of the men speaks, gesturing to the space River had been detained in just minutes ago.   _Kovarian_.  John snaps his eyes to River.  What if he hadn't gotten here on time?"We began tailing her this morning and caught up with her about an hour ago.""For your sakes you better hope it is actually her this time.  I won't tolerate any more of your idiotic oversights."  Kovarian's voice is hard and cold, sending a chill through John as he fully realizes this is the woman River has spent half of her life under.The five of them move into the side room, and John misses their obvious surprised reactions to finding the space empty as River suddenly grabs his hand in hers, her eyes bright as she speaks, "Run."A grin works its way across his face as he nods, both of them sprinting across the room and through the door, barely missing the rain of bullets that follows them.  Without sparing a glance behind them, they run up the stairs and break onto the first floor where the majority of the patrons and staff have halted their business due to the sudden commotion, fear frozen on many faces by the sounds of the gunshots made by Kovarian's men.The guard stands with John's missing boot in hand, hovering over the small looking man who had been the earlier victim of John's unfortunate aim as if he had been interrogating him before the noise came from downstairs.  Skidding to a halt, John plucks his shoe from the guard's grasp, smiling as the man can only give him a stunned look in return.  "Thanks for holding onto that, mate."  John gives him a mock salute and is on the run again a second later as River calls, " _Doctor_ ," in a tone he really shouldn't find as exciting as he does and is dragged with her back into a sprint.They run through the large doors of the museum and all but fly down the stairs.  "Jacket," River say, holding out her hand as they stop in front of a tiny red car.  Perplexed, John only frowns at her as he shrugs out of his tweed and hands it to her, nervously glancing up at the museum.Fisting the cloth around her hand, River punches in the window to the car, unlocks the doors and hops inside, heedless of the glass and John's surprised stare.  "Just get in," she snaps as she pulls at the panel under the steering wheel and fumbles with the wiring of the vehicle.  With another glance up at the museum, John sees Kovarian's men stumbling out of the building.  "Hurry, hurry, hurry," he urges as he rounds the car and jumps into the passenger seat.Bullets sink into the metal shell of the car at the same time River manages to get the engine to rev to life, slamming her foot onto the gas pedal and pulling out onto the street just before any more damage can be done.  John gives a slightly manic laugh as he looks behind him at the rapidly shrinking museum, clinging to the handle of the car door as River speedily weaves through the city.Neither one of them says a word as she navigates through the crowded streets of Budapest, John's heart still feeling lodged in his throat even as he comes down from the adrenaline high.  It's not until they're out of the city and speeding down some lonely, back country road does he finally begin to relax.The sky above them has darkened considerably by storm clouds rumbling in, painting the rolling Hungarian hills an even richer green than before as drops of rain being to fall sporadically from the sky.  They're a good hour and a half out of the city before the car runs out of fuel, River forced to pull over to the side of the road as they clunk to a stop.In a silent gesture of comfort, John reaches over and takes her hand in his, threading their fingers together.  The silence between them suddenly grows heavy with tension and he sighs, realizing that now is going to have to be when they talk about everything that has happened.  River looks at him, uncertainty written across her face and her bottom lip caught between her teeth and suddenly John acknowledges to himself that he doesn't want to talk.  Not right now.  Right now he wants to kiss her.  So he does.With his free hand he tangles his fingers into her curls and pulls her to him, crushing her lips to his in a kiss that truly conveys the desperation he felt at needing her back in his life after just a short, painful period without her.  By the way she returns it, with an eager passion and needy whines that shoot straight through him, he gathers that she felt a similar way.Heedless of the small amount of room the tiny car gives them, River somehow manages to cross from her space into his lap without pulling her lips from his, the soft, black skirt of her dress now bunched around her thighs.  " _River_ ," he breathes her name as their lips part, his hands tenderly skimming up the smooth skin of her thighs as he revels in the feeling of the heat of her core pressed directly against the growing bulge in his trousers." _Sweetie_ ," she replies in a whisper, her silky voice full of affection and wrapping around his heart.  Her lips trail along the line of his jaw, leaving light kisses along his neck until she slowly sinks her teeth into the skin at his pulse point, laving the possessive bite with her tongue and eliciting from him a pleased groan.His hands run up the sides of the beaded bodice of her dress, his fingers lightly spreading up and over the swell of her breasts to teasingly trace the neckline.  River shudders as his finger dips into her cleavage, and he is pleased to see goose bumps briefly appear across her skin from just his touch.  He captures her lips with his in another kiss as he sweeps his hands around to her back to fumble with the complicated laces of her dress."Leave it," she mumbles, and a well timed grind of her hips against him is all it takes for him to comply, both of them releasing breathy moans in anticipation.Next time, because there  _will_  be a next time, he promises to himself to strip her of all of her clothing and press her bare form into a bed where he can worship her properly.  But right now she is impatiently unclipping his braces and undoing the zip of his trousers- this time they are both too impatient to deal with clothing, both just so ready to have the other that clothing is but a trivial matter.When her hand fists around his hard cock he practically sees black, groaning at her touch and nearly coming right then as she tosses him an absolutely wicked smile.  Her thumb swipes over the tip, spreading the wetness there down his aching erection as she pumps her hand over him twice in a tortuously slow rhythm, smiling at him in a way that conveys how much she is enjoying teasing him.  "River," John manages to choke out on a moan, trying to let her know how much he wants her, wants  _all of her_ , in that moment.Her smile softens, and in her eyes there is that same warmth that fills his chest every time he thinks of her.  Either his plea was understood or she wants him just as badly in that second as he wants her because she doesn't waste another moment teasing him, lifting her hips, tugging the material of her knickers aside and slowly sinking down on him.  For a moment, nothing but pure bliss fills his mind as he becomes seated within her, his hands gripping tightly at her waist.She is incredibly wet despite their lack of foreplay, and that combined with her tight heat creates a sensation that has his eyes practically rolling back to his brain.  Her hands grip at his shoulders and she whimpers as she begins to slowly move over him, his hips lifting to meet her every downward thrust.High emotion, heat and electricity races under his skin and he wonders if she can feel it as she presses her forehead against his, brief kisses exchanged between soft pants and breathy cries of pleasure.  They don't say anything because there isn't any room for words, their motions speaking for them as they move together, hands clutching possessively and their bodies incapable of being any closer together.  In this moment he feels as if his heart is resting directly next to hers.A warm tingle builds at the base of his spine and he grunts with the effort of holding back, determined to bring her over the edge with him.  As if she read his mind, he suddenly feels her muscles clamp tightly around him as she cries out his name, her body shaking and her fingers curling tightly into the material of his shirt as she orgasms, her face the very image of pleasure.  Gritting out her name in return, his arms wrap tightly around her waist as he comes, his face pressed into the skin where her neck meets shoulder.For a moment they stay completely still, the only sound that of their heavy breathing and the rain patting lightly against the outside of the car.John can't help the ridiculous smile that crosses his face as he tenderly hooks a curl behind her ear, prompting her to look up at him.  A light pink flushes over her cheeks in a blush that he wisely does not comment on, but he thinks that if possible, he falls a little more in love with her that very second.After pressing a soft kiss to his lips that leaves his heart feeling fit to burst, River moves off of him and climbs back into the driver's seat.  As he tucks himself back into his trousers and re-clips his braces, he takes in the appearance of her wrinkled dress, swollen lips curved into an absent looking smile, and the absolute disarray of her hair."What?"  She asks as she catches him staring, self-consciously lifting a hand to her curls.  Capturing her hand with his own, he presses a kiss to her knuckles to keep her from fidgeting and grins.  "Nothing.  You just look thoroughly shagged and happy about it."She rolls her eyes, trying and utterly failing to repress a smile as she replies, "Well I never said I was  _unhappy_  about it, did I?"John preens, tugging smugly at the lapels of his jacket and she laughs, shoving at him.  "Get out of the car, you great idiot.  We have to walk until we can find another one to steal."

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> Proven fact: every comment adds one year to my lifespan (:


	4. You got to lose to know how to win

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter!!! The response to this story has been more than I could have ever hoped for- it makes me want to write more! Thank you all soooo much for sticking with it and letting me know what you think. Your comments make me a ridiculously happy person <3 <3 <3
> 
> Chapter title from Dream On by Aerosmith (who else???)

Their search for a car turns into a two hour walk down the country road, not once seeing another person.  The scenery provides only farms, livestock and large, old looking houses set far off the road, their voices filling the after-rain hush as they exchange stories from their lives. 

 

John tells of his childhood spent in foster care, about his friends, and about the monotonous job as a professor that he chose to eventually give up.  In return he hears of wild adventures River had in her teenage years, learns that Kovarian paying her bail began a cycle of indebtedness she could never leave, and finds out that Father Octavian was the one to eventually help her escape, ultimately paying the highest price by doing so.

 

"You don't have to make this a revenge mission," John says, realizing that she wasn't in Budapest because she was running from Kovarian, rather she was following her in another attempt to take her down.

 

"It's not so much about revenge as it is about self-preservation," she says.  "If I go back to prison, I'm as good as dead.  And even if I wasn't, I would still rather die than be locked behind bars again."  River pauses.  "She'll be after me for the rest of my life if I don't do something about it."

 

"There's always running," John suggests.

 

River looks at him strangely, as if contemplating the idea for the first time.  A small smile works its way across her lips.  "Yes.  I suppose there is."

 

For a while neither of them speaks, continuing to walk down the road that is starting to feel more and more endless.  His feet ache, his clothes are wet, and he would pay an outrageous amount for a cup of tea right now.  At least it's not raining anymore, he thinks as he glances over at River, his tweed jacket draped around her shoulders a she fights off the chill.

 

"Are you going to leave again?" John asks after a moment of watching her, breaking the lull of comfortable silence that had settled.

 

River watches the ground as they walk, her lips pressed into a line and looking as if she is trying to come up with the right answer to his question.  "You scare me," she finally replies.  "But I can't seem to want to stay away from you for very long."

 

"Well you bloody well terrify me," John says, a smile coming to his lips.  When she only smirks at him in turn, he decides to push forward.  "Is that why you left?"

 

"Mainly."  She bites her lip, looking at him uncertainly, as if hesitant to show him the vulnerable side he never sees but knows is always there.  He stays silent, which seems to encourage her.  "I left because I was afraid of having my heart stolen by a man who wears ridiculous clothes and barely knows me.  Not to mention you had taken a job to put me in jail- not that you would have ever turned me in."

 

Despite her statement being completely true, it still surprises him.  "How do you know that?"

 

She smiles at him as if the answer is obvious.  "It was in the way you kissed me."

 

John fights back a smile.  River's kisses are his weakness- he could watch her apply that poison lipstick and still be unable to resist the want to have her lips on his.  It makes sense for that to be the code that helped her read him like a book.

 

After a moment, River speaks again.  "I don't think I could leave again even if I wanted to.  Not now, anyway."

 

"Why not now?"

 

"Because now I've accepted it."

 

"Accepted what?"

 

"That my heart belonged to you long before I even thought of giving it away."

 

XxX

 

"Screwdrivers are the most useful tool," John states as he plops down on the bed beside River, gingerly taking her hand that still has a handcuff locked tightly around the wrist.

 

They found a pleasant looking farm home that had been converted into a small bed and breakfast for travelers passing through.  The moment they stepped onto the porch the sky had opened up and sent rain down in torrential sheets.  There was no question that here was where they would be staying for the night.

 

The room they were given didn't have much space and the bed would barely be able to fit both of them, but John can't say that he's exactly put out by the idea of having to sleep pressed in so closely to River.  In fact, he's rather looking forward to it.

 

"It's not going to work," River says with a small frown as John uses the screwdriver he borrowed from the owner of the house to try to unlock the cuff.

 

"Have some faith, dear," he mumbles as he tosses his head in an attempt to get the fringe of his hair out of his line of vision.  Tongue caught between his teeth, he wiggles the tip of the screwdriver into the lock.  A few seconds later and the lock releases with a soft  _click_ , John beaming at River even as she huffs.

 

One glance at her newly freed wrist is enough to wipe the triumphant grin right off his face.  In a futile attempt to hide the damage done, River moves to hurriedly pull the bunched up sleeve of her dress down over her wrist.  John halts her movements by firmly grasping her elbow, his eyes locked on the raw skin that was previously hidden by the metal cuff, an angry red line encircling her wrist and only intensifying as blood begins to prickle at the surface.

 

John swallows, his face grim as he tries to push down the anger welling inside of him.  "Does it hurt?"  He asks, already knowing the answer because how could it not?

 

"It's fine," River answers simply and his eyes immediately snap to her face, cataloging her carefully blank expression.

 

Sighing at her, John leans in and presses a kiss to her brow.  "Don't lie to me, River Song."

 

She hesitates before amending, "It hurts a little."

 

John snorts, standing and pulling her with him to the sink where he turns the tap for hot water.  "I suppose that's at least closer to the truth than your first answer," he says as he wets a washcloth and gently dabs at the damaged skin of her wrist. 

 

River hisses, immediately trying to pull back but kept in place by his firm, but gentle grasp.  He cleans her wound with careful movements and soft apologies, wrapping it in a thin scarf he finds in the closet once he is done.  For good measure, he presses a gentle kiss to the material just at the center of her wrist before releasing her.  "Better?"

 

River watches him with a soft look that immediately melts his heart.  "Perfect," she answers, pressing close to him and bestowing him with a kiss he gladly returns.

 

That evening, as night falls and thunder rolls in, he makes good on his earlier promise to himself, stripping her of her dress to leave it in a forgotten pile on the floor as he presses her into the mattress of the small bed.  The rain pounds against the window and lightning occasionally illuminates the space in bright flashes as he finally gets to run his hands over her body in the way he has been longing to for weeks.  Between her hitched gasps and breathy little moans that send desire sparking through his veins, he learns that River Song is quite the screamer. 

 

XxX

 

Two more stolen cars and one flight later and they are back in London long enough for them grab a few of John's things before they officially begin their running.  Excitement fills him at the very idea- they can go anywhere,  _everywhere_ , and all the while her hand will be in his.

 

Ascending the stairs to his flat, John scowls at the new eviction notice stuck to the door and pulls out his keys.  "You won't have to worry about that anymore," River says as she wraps her arms around his waist from behind and presses soft kisses to the back of his neck, making the task of unlocking the door far more difficult than it should be.

 

"We're only supposed to be here for a minute, stop trying to distract me," he admonishes, a shiver running through him as her hands travel slowly down his chest, her nails lightly scratching over the thin material of his shirt.

 

"But distracting you is so much fun, sweetie," she purrs before lifting onto her toes to gently pull his earlobe between her teeth.  He growls at the sensation, a deep sound in his throat that he can tell she loves by the way her lips curve against his neck as she moves to press more kisses there. 

 

Finally he gets the door unlocked, grabbing her hand and pulling her inside before shoving her back against the other side of it with a forceful kiss that rattles the door in its frame.  Her hands fist in his hair as she returns the kiss, her tongue sweeping through his mouth and his hands moving from her waist to splay across her bum, his fingers digging into the flesh there to pull her even closer against him.  Maybe they can stay just a bit longer than they originally planned.

 

"My bad girl," he breathes against her lips as they part.

 

"That she certainly is," comes a cold voice from across the room, causing them both to freeze, River's eyes widening and flashing with a brief flicker of fear.

 

John turns to face the voice, distantly surprised that his heart doesn't give out as he takes in the sight of Kovarian lounging in his chair on the other side of the room.

 

The woman stands, her dark red lips set in a disapproving line and the one eye not covered by an eye patch trained solely on him as she approaches them.  She grins then, a sickly sort of smile that makes John's stomach roll.  "Who would have thought that the bumbling bounty hunter with hearts in his eyes would have turned into my greatest ally?" 

 

At John's stunned silence she turns to River, gliding the knuckle of her index finger down River's face before gripping her chin and speaking softly, "He has made you careless, my dear."

 

River yanks backward out of Kovarian's grasp, prompting the woman to tsk in disapproval.  "Still as stubborn as ever, I see.  Hopefully that failing won't prevent you from taking the deal I'm about to offer."

 

River narrows her eyes.  "You don't have anything I want."

 

Kovarian's mouth twists into a smile, one fine eyebrow raising in a challenge.  Suddenly, in the span of a second, John has the cold muzzle of a gun pressed to the center of his forehead.  His heart leaps to his throat even as he attempts to keep any sign of fear from his face.  Where had she even been keeping the gun?

 

Kovarian keeps her cold stare on River.  "I have your dear Doctor's life in my hands.  Are you telling me you don't want him alive?"

 

There's a beat of silence that somehow sounds oddly like defeat before River answers, "I'm listening."

 

"I'm willing to make a trade- I get you, and your sweetie gets to go free."

 

"Why not just kill me now?"  River asks, earning a grin from Kovarian.  "If I just wanted you dead, that would have been accomplished a long time ago."

 

"Then what do you want?"

 

Kovarian sighs, as if the answer is obvious.  "I have my hands in the police and in all of the bail bond agencies in London- including Mr. Lux's.  Without you behind bars I'm losing quite a bit of money."  She pauses, reaching out to brush a few curls from River's face.  "But you are a traitor, my dear.  Your death will come.  And with you in a place where you can't run, maybe we can draw it out a bit- make things a little more interesting."

 

John's blood runs cold at her words and he finally finds his voice enough to say, "No deal."

 

Kovarian looks at him, the calm composure of her face suddenly morphing into an ugly anger as she presses the end of the gun harder to his skull.

 

"No!  It's a deal," comes River's voice, her tone laced with a slight edge of panic.  The anger is immediately wiped from Kovarian's face as she looks back at River, the muzzle of the gun no longer digging into his skin but still pressed to his forehead.

 

Kovarian smiles at River and simply says, "Excellent choice."

 

XxX

 

Kovarian's men drive them separately to Lux's Bail Bonds, John internally panicking the entire way.  There has to be some way out of this.

 

When they arrive and John steps out of the car, he watches as River does the same, handcuffs tightened securely around her wrists, a blank expression on her face, and her chin held high as she studiously avoids his gaze.

 

Kovarian stands next him, a twisted little smile on her lips that practically screams her triumph.  "Don't look so sad, it's not all bad.  I hear the person who brings her in gets one hundred thousand pounds."

 

River approaches with two of Kovarian's men trailing closely behind her.  Kovarian looks at John and jerks her head toward the door.  "Go on.  Take her in.  And don't even think about trying anything."

 

John swallows heavily, his heart filling with lead and bile rising to his throat as he gently grips River's arm and begins the walk toward the building.

 

"You can still run.  Right now," John speaks once they're out of earshot of Kovarian and her men.

 

River shakes her head, giving him a small, sad smle of resignation.  "Running sounds far less appealing without you, my love."

 

John slows their pace, his grip on her arm almost hard enough to bruise as anger wells inside him to cover his fear.  "How are you so calm about this?"  He snaps, feeling only further inscensed as she gives him another fleeting smile, her eyes roaming over his face like it will be her last opportunity to do so.  "Because I made my choice," she answers simply.

 

" _No_ , River.  You walking into certain death is not a  _choice_."

 

"It is," she argues quietly.  "And you have to get out of here as soon as they take me to holding.  Kovarian isn't known for holding up her end of deals- she's going to want you dead."  River's tone goes flat and John shakes his head, barely even registering her words and certainly not giving them a moment's thought.

 

"I told you not to take the deal."

 

River pins him with a hard look.  "And what was I supposed to do?  Let her kill you?"

 

"That wasn't your decision to make," John hisses as they enter the building, distantly wondering how he's even allowing this to happen.  He needs a plan.

 

The woman at the desk, Miss Evangelista if he remembers correctly, looks up at their entrance.  Her eyes widen as she immediately recognizes River, quickly grabbing for the phone and no doubt calling Mr. Lux from his office.

 

"It was exactly my decision," River snaps at him.  "And as long as you keep your skinny arse safe then I'll know it was the right one."

 

John feels tears prickle behind his eyes, panic swelling in his chest as the weight of the situation fully settles and he realizes that it is far too late for any sort of plan.  This  _cannot_  happen.  "River, this can't-  _you_  don't get to just-"

 

At that moment Mr. Lux appears, bursting into the room slightly out of breath and with two guards following closely behind him.  "Good god," he speaks, looking floored as he stares at River in shock.  "Take her to holding."

 

The guards move forward, forcefully grabbing River by each arm and pulling her from his grasp.  Mr. Lux claps him on the back, the weight of the man's hand feeling like a burning weight as John can only watch helplessly as the guards forcefully shove River through the back doors.  He feels oddly numb, his entire body trembling as he realizes his whole world just signed her own death sentence.

 

Mr. Lux gives him a wide grin that turns John's stomach.  "I don't know how you did it, but I guess that part doesn't really matter.  Here you go, as promised," the man shoves a check for the amount of one hundred thousand pounds into John's hand and he stares down at it, wondering how it doesn't burn to the touch.

 

The man continues to speak to him but John doesn't hear a word he says, his mind racing.  "Where are they going to take her after holding?"

 

"Song?"  Mr. Lux chuckles darkly, John's blood turning to ice at his next words.  "I wouldn't be surprised if they don't take her down to Stormcage."

 

XxX

 

The next two days are full of nothing but stress and panic.  He doesn't touch his food.  He doesn't sleep.  He doesn't do anything except sit glued to the telly, watching as the news of River's capture breaks.

 

It turns out that Mr. Lux was right about them transporting her into Stormcage, and some part of him is filled with hope at the news.  At least she is alive.  He just needs her to stay that way as he comes up with a plan to get her out.

 

"You're telling me that you're going to try to break her out of  _Stormcage_?"

 

His two friends sit across from him now, Amy gaping at him and Rory sitting silently with a frown on his face.

 

"Yes, Amelia.  That is exactly what I'm going to do."

 

Her answering laugh comes with a slightly hysteric edge.  "John that is madness!  It's the highest security prison in England!"

 

"In all of the UK, actually," Rory amends, and John suddenly realizes that he's not going to be getting much support with this idea.  Not that he can blame them.

 

"Look, I'm going to do this with or without your help.   _With_  your help I'm sure I have a much better chance.  All I'm asking for is a few ideas."

 

Amy slouches a bit, her lips pressed into a hard line before she makes a frustrated noise and jabs her finger at him.  "Just because I'm helping you doesn't mean I think it's a good idea."

 

John grins.  "It shouldn't be that hard to come up with a plan, right?  All I have to do is get inside."

 

"And then?"  Rory asks, looking skeptical.

 

"And  _then_  I'll just figure it out from there."

 

"What happens if you get caught?"  Amy asks.  "No offense, John, but you're a  _physicist_.  Not some criminal mastermind!"

 

"Look.  I have to try.  If I'm careful, then everything should be fine.  Just give me some ideas."

 

Amy opens her mouth to protest further but Rory cuts her off.  "How about instead of trying to  _break_  in, you  _blend_  in."

 

John frowns.  "What do you mean?"

 

"Be a health inspector.  Or a news reporter.  Someone who looks like they belong."

 

John nods, still frowning to himself as he thinks.

 

"Maybe they have some job openings," Amy suggests with a resigned sigh.  "If you can get a job as a prison employee, you'll probably be given all of the information about the inmates and their schedules and stuff."

 

"That's brilliant," Rory says, pulling out his mobile to bring up the prison's page of employment opportunities.

 

After waiting a brief second for it to load, he squints at the page and reads, "Maintenance man...prison guard...janitor..."

 

"None of those are guaranteed to get me anywhere near her," John says, starting to feel frustrated as Rory continues to scroll.

 

"Wait," Rory says suddenly, tapping his thumb over one job listing in particular and shoving the phone under John's face.

 

_In-prison physician.  Full time.  Previous experience working with inmates desired but not required._

 

John turns the idea over in his mind, a slow grin spreading across his face as he realizes that it is by far the best option.  "Doctor it is."

 

XxX

 

The application process to Stormcage is a pain, but moves swifter than any other job he has ever sought after.

 

Three days after turning in a completely falsified resume with his application, John sits in front of Dr. Martha Jones, the lead physician at Stormcage prison, and tries not to fidget as she reviews his file.

 

Lifting a delicate brow, she looks up at him over the papers.  "It says here you were a physician at Belmarsh."

 

"For two years," John confirms.

 

She nods, going back to reading through the application and leaving him to sit painfully in silence.  When she finishes, she closes the folder and leans back in her chair as she regards him with a careful gaze that causes him to begin to internally panic.  What if everything was too much of an obvious lie?

 

Suddenly, a warm smile spreads across her face.  "I have to say, Dr. Smith, your file is perfect for what we're looking for here- it's usually very difficult to find a doctor with previous working experience in a prison.  When can you start?"

 

"Tomorrow," he answers immediately, his heart pounding.

 

"Perfect!"  She exclaims warmly, sitting forward and sliding him a folder.  "In there is everything you need to know about the job.  I look forward to working with you, Dr. Smith."  She smiles and John tries to return it, knowing that it must look like more of a grimace, his anxiety at his impending mission overriding any relief he has at securing the job.

 

XxX

 

The prison is massive, lit with an eerie green glow and is so quiet that it puts John on edge.

 

With his new white lab coat in place of his usual tweed, John walks down one of the particularly long corridors and swipes his ID badge to be granted access into the security office.

 

"Hello!"  He greets loudly as he sweeps inside with all the confidence of a man who knows exactly what he's doing, though he really,  _really_  doesn't.  It's only his second day on the job, but today is it.  Today he is getting River out.

 

John grins as the three officers swivel in their chairs to face him, frowns on their faces.  "I'm needing to pull up information on a sick inmate.  You wouldn't mind if I used one of your computers for a tick, would you?"

 

The officer to his left stands and John tries not to be intimated as the man towers over him.  "Use the computer in medical," he grumbles after a thorough, rather insulting inspection of John's badge.  Well.  He imagines it would be insulting if he were a  _real_  doctor, anyway.

 

John laughs.  "If I could do that, trust me, mate, I would.  Unfortunately, Johnson spilled his coffee over it this morning and short-circuited the mainframe.  Third time he's done it this month.  And don't even get me started on how many reports he loses each week."  He leans closer to the officer to whisper conspiratorially, "I wouldn't be surprised if he isn't sacked by the end of the month."

 

"Anyway," John continues, clapping the officer on the shoulder as he moves past him and plops into his chair, "I won't be but a mo'."  He relaxes a bit as the officer grumbles something about doughnuts and leaves the room, slamming the door behind him.

 

Choosing to ignore the other two officers entirely, John opens the prison database and inputs the password given to him by Dr. Jones.  All it takes is a view clicks and entering the name  _River Song_  and her information appears on the screen before him.

 

Eyes skimming over the screen, John learns that she was processed in at the end of last week and is being held in block Z, cell 86.  With his heart hammering, John closes out of the database, thanks the other two officers that pay him no attention, and exits the office. 

 

For a moment he rests against the wall, his mind racing in a futile attempt to form a structured plan.

 

Okay.  He's inside.  He knows where she is.  All he has to do is get her out of her cell and escape.  He swallows heavily.  Easier said than done.

 

Not wanting to waste time, John forces himself from his leaning position against the wall and follows his feet down a few winding corridors until he finds the Reports and Documentation Office.  It's small, smells like coffee and printing ink, and holds a single desk with a young woman who looks like she'd rather be anywhere else but here.

 

John reads her badge as he approaches, giving her a wide smile.  "Hello, Anita.  I was wondering if you could print out the prison blueprints for me?"

 

Anita frowns.  "Why do you need them?"

 

"Oh,  _I_  don't need them.  The building inspector does- he's here and he's just wanting to match up what he sees with what's on paper.  You understand," John lies with ease.

 

Anita nods.  "Just give me a moment."

 

It takes all of his patience and willpower to not bounce on his feet as she works, trying his best not to look as nervous as he feels.  The closer he gets to River, the more panicked he becomes.  What if he can't get to her?  What if Kovarian has already gotten to her?  What if once he finds her they have no way to escape?

 

Pushing those thoughts from his mind, John thanks Anita as she hands him the prints and exits the office. 

 

  
_Now what?_ He asks himself, pausing in the middle of the hallway to examine the blueprints and find River's cell.  His brain is running a mile a minute and every ticking second feels like an eternity.  After a few minutes of calculation that takes all of his focus, John learns that block C is the block furthest from River- if he can create a distraction there, it will be infinitely easier for them to escape. 

 

Just as his brain is running through all of the possible options, his eyes land on a fire alarm installed in the wall.  He pauses.  It couldn't possibly be that simple.

 

Standing in the middle of a corridor, John argues with himself over his plan.  It seems so simple and yet so many terrible things could go wrong.  He could wait a few days, study the blueprints a little longer and come up with a more elaborate plan.

 

Kovarian's promise to River rings in his head, and that more than anything else spurs his legs forward.  Now isn't the time for elaborate.  Now is the time to get River out.

 

Block C turns out to be dreary and just as quiet at the rest of the prison, so when his fingers grip the handle of the fire alarm and pulls, the answering wail is practically deafening.  The sprinklers overhead drench him in seconds as he sprints past oncoming guards and out of the block, his shoes squelching against the floor.

 

By the time he makes it to block Z he is considerably out of breath, but hope rises in his chest as he sees only one guard standing between him the block of cells.

 

"I need to be shown to the inmate in cell 86," John says as he approaches the guard, foregoing a greeting entirely and holding up his badge for inspection.

 

The guard holds up his hand in a halting gesture.  "Sorry, Dr. Smith.  No one's allowed in any of the blocks until they figure out what's going on in block C."

 

John nearly groans in frustration, becoming increasingly impatient when he knows River is somewhere just beyond this door.  "Of course you couldn't make it easy for me," John says, pulling out the stun spray he bought weeks ago and spraying it in the guard's face without hesitation. 

 

Confusion crosses the guard's face for a total of a second before he drops to the ground in a full-bodied coughing fit.  His hand just grasps his communicator when he promptly falls unconscious, John feeling not an ounce of guilt as he reaches down and takes the man's key card, the cell keys, and his gun- if they have to improvise on their way out, John is sure River would feel infinitely safer with a gun gripped securely in her hand.

 

"Sleep well," John quips as his pats the guard lightly on the face and stands.  The door slides effortlessly open with one scan of the key card and John steps inside.

 

Ignoring calls from the other inmates, John sprints down the corridor, the tail of his lab coat billowing behind him.   _81..._ _82..._ Time seems to slow even as he runs, John suddenly realizing that whatever happens next is it.  It's the end of their chapter.  One of two things happens on the next page- either they fail spectacularly or their life of running together can finally begin.    


_83...84..._

Adrenaline fuels him as his feet pound against the concrete floor, a grin spreading across his face at the knowledge that River will be at his side no matter what happens.

 

_85..._

 

Cell 86.

 

John skids to a stop, now significantly out of breath.  His fingers curl around the bars, his breath coming out in sharp pants as he allows his vision to adjust to the inside darkness of the cell.  After a moment of unreasonable panic, he recognizes the sight of his curly-haired fugitive curled up on the corner of her cot.

 

"River," he pants, a pure, unbridled happiness blooming within his chest as her head snaps up at the sound of his voice, her face the very picture of surprise.

 

"John?"  She hops to her feet and rushes to the cell door, her fingers curling around the bars.  "What are you doing?"  Even as she asks the question she drinks in the sight of him as if she thought she would never see him again.  "What does it look like?"  He parries, reaching through the bars to briefly cup her face, knowing the feeling.

 

Taking the stolen keys from his pocket, he jingles them with a proud smile.  "We're getting you out of here."

 

After three tries, he finally finds the right key, turning it and throwing open the door.  John holds out his hand and grins widely at her.  "I do believe we have an awful lot of running to do, dear."

 

River smiles in return, placing her hand in his.  "I'm looking forward to it, sweetie."

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!!!

**Author's Note:**

> As always, thank you so much for reading! I'll put the second chapter up in a few days
> 
> I'm pretty nervous about this one- let me know what you think?????


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